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God’s instruments October 17, 2011

Posted by theregenerateme in Uncategorized.
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If I could write everyday, I would. If somehow I could transpose my thoughts onto paper by just thinking them, I would have written a few books by now, no doubt. But alas, other priorities that God has entrusted me with must come first. My husband, children, and home. And I am deeply grateful for my calling….but just for a few minutes today, my writing will take 1st place, as I desire to piece together what only God has orchestrated, and continues to….

 

Just the other day I was thinking about the word instrument, in how we relate it to being used by God. Just like we consider what it means to be a “part of the body” of Christ, so it is with being a used instrument by Him. You see, when something is broken, in need of repair, or just in need of different parts to perform correctly, we use an instrument of some sort to fix that said issue. Doctor’s use many instruments when performng simple routine procedures, all the way up to a very intricate detailed surgery. Mechanics are no different. They use multiple instruments and tools to repair vehicles. The list can go on and on. You get the idea. When I think about the parallel example of a doctor and his instrument, to God and us…it really blows my mind. Though the doctor is skilled and full of knowledge in a very complicated surgery, without the proper surgical tools, he is unable to perform the task. Of course any parallel that we have with the Lord will come up short, not being the exact image, because God is perfect, and obviously does not “need” us to perform or complete His tasks. However, we are His, created by Him, created for Him, and can and will be used by Him for His glory. This has certainly been the case in all my Christian life over the last nearly 6 years. To be specific in this present case, I have seen the hand of God absolutely move within and through His instruments, to orchestrate something encouraging, something that gives me hope, something that is worthy to give Him praise!

 

Four years ago today, I was involved in a car accident. It was my 2nd accident in 2 weeks, and I was 7 months pregnant. That began what has become one of the greatest longsuffering trials in my life. Though I know it may not be over any time soon, today I must praise my Lord, for all the work He has done in me, through me, and for me. I am closer to Him, relying on His strength, not my own, in ways that I may not be if it weren’t for my chronic daily back pain. God has even used my pain to train my children at a young age what compassion and carrying one another’s burdens in prayer looks like. My husband also suffers from chronic daily pain (headache disorder), so we are more able to understand one another, give compassion and lots of grace, and lift one another up in prayer too. God has brought kind people into my life within the medical field. A Christian chiropractor who has become a friend and a prayer warrior on my behalf. A massage therapist who loves Jesus with all of her heart, and has devoted much time over the years to treat me, pray over me, and even care for my children. Even the doctors that God has brought into (and out of) my life that weren’t as kind or able to help–God prepared my heart beforehand for them too. I listened to an awesome sermon on Job several years back, the night before I was to meet with a neurosurgeon about possible back surgery. Once the apt. came, my heart was softened with proper perspective, and the doctor’s arrogant bedside manner couldn’t even touch my joy that day. I look at all of these people as God’s instruments really. Some have been obvious encouragers, and others have still had a greater purpose. A purpose to remind me that He is really the only one that will not fail me. He is really the only one I can fully rely and depend on. Because sin entered this world, our bodies wasting away and getting sick is just one of the consequences. I see more clearly because of this trial, that my reward is still awaiting me at HOME; heaven. I honestly understand why we (believers) are called “aliens to this world”. I can tell I don’t belong here, but my citizenship is in heaven with my eternal Heavenly Father. But, for as long as He sees fit for us to be here, He uses us as His instruments…and I am very grateful for that.

 

Just over the last couple of weeks, I have gone through another “valley” of this trial. A new MRI with reports of degenerative disc disease and severe inflammation in my low backbone, lots of stressful phone calls to get medical info where it needed to be, in hopes of seeing a new neuro surgeon, and then a call of rejection by that said doc’s office. My heart has felt a bit broken, but my gracious Abba has brought me much comfort today. After only 2 days since the declined consult call, I talked to a different doctor’s office, and they wanted to see me right away. Wow. Trying not to get my hopes up, I said a prayer of praise and thanksgiving, and asked for proctection over my heart. Today I met this doctor. Right before he walked in, I felt the tears begin to build up and out of my eyes, streaming down onto my cheeks. I wiped them away and whispered softly, “Not my will Father, but Yours….Your grace IS sufficient for me.” After about a 25 minute consult with this kind man, I walked away with hope. Something I have not felt (for this particular situation), in years. We talked about surgery, procedures, medications, etc. He wants to help me, and does not want to give up. Praise God!!!!! I know this may be a slow process, producing the need to perservere. So I will continue to cling to Romans 5:3-5. I had my sister paint a canvas of it that sits beautifully over our bed. It’s really both me and John’s life verse. What a solid truth to meditate on. He will never disappoint us!

 

So, to all who has been His instrument on my behalf….thank you!!!!! I love each and every one of you, some I realize I do not even know or have not met. Your prayers, calls, meals, kindness, support, and love for me and my whole family are deeply humbling, and I am forever grateful. Please continue to pray for John and I, for clarity and wisdom. We have some big decisions to make, regarding back surgery, and the BIG recovery involved.

 

Life is hard, but God is good, and worthy to be praised!

In His Hands,
Lauren